It's been well over five years since Noah and the Whales song Five years time hit the charts. But the future is something that has been on my mind a lot recently. The tag 'Ten years time' has been going around a lot on social media sites by a lot of young bloggers and vloggers and I'm so relieved to see that I'm not the only one who doesn't really know what I want to do or where I see myself being in five years or even ten years time.
I'm 19 year old and less than 14 weeks I will have sat my exams and left college. I'll be heading out into the big wide world and frankly I'm scared. I'm excited too but mainly scared. I don't feel like school has prepared me for living away from home. I can't cook very well and I haven't had a home economics lesson since year nine. My maths lessons never taught me how to pay my bills and put my money into decent savings accounts or open an ISA or deal with tax. Knowing the theorems of Pythagoras and PI seem pretty useless for what I need to be able to do in real life.
I know what I want out of life, I want a good job that pays me well so that I can do the things I want to do and have a family and be surrounded by good friends. These are all typical aspirations. I'm sure that for anyone reading this, that they must want these things.
When, I was six I wanted to be a writer, I was always writing stories or making little books. As I grew older I wanted to become a journalist, write about people's stories that I felt needed to be told. But a lot of that has changed. Secretly, I still want those things but people around me tell me that they're not possible. That being a writer is a huge risk and that I should find a job in another field as a lot of the time in freelance journalism the money isn't always there and I'd be better with a solid 9-5 office job that I know I'm always going to get paid for. I guess that's part of the reason I write this blog to keep up with my writing and not lose sight of something I love.
I'm worried that people will drift in and out of my life and won't stay around. I started college almost two years ago and half the people I would've said were my best friends in secondary school just aren't in my life anymore. Not because we've fallen out but because of distance. Our lives are so different, some are at uni and others are in full time jobs and don't have time to come home and visit. Going to see friends and planning days out together can get really expensive for me because I live in the middle of nowhere and public transport isn't cheap. I am constantly meeting new people but I like the idea of having solidarity, friends who I can always rely on. I have one best friend who I am always there for and she is always there for me no matter if it's 3am in the morning or she's on holiday in the Alps. She will always be there for me. I hope to meet more people like that and form new lasting friendships.
I hope to be able to afford my own place to live. House prices today as astronomical. But I hate the idea that I might still be living in rented accommodation up until my early 30s. The idea of having a home that you fully own when you're older is something that I'm sure loads of other people my age aren't even considering right now. But the majority of people I know that have just put a down payment on their starters homes are in the late 20's and have been saving since there early 20s.
Maybe, I am spending too much time looking to the future. Let me know you're worries and hopes for the future in the comments below. This is the sort of post where I feel it would've been easier to film and talk about than actually trying to make sense of my thoughts by writing them down.
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